Foster Parent or Foster Mom: Always a Mom

Foster Mom

Being a foster Mom

Being a foster Mom is not about making money. A lot of people think this way. Let’s look at Canada. You will receive a total of  Cdn$77.25 per day while a foster child is in your care. This amount covers the child’s expenses as well as the carer’s allowance. As it is, recently we have seen a decrease in the number of foster parents as times get harder for the average household and they are stretched to care for their own children.

So it must be something else that drives one to become a foster parent. Spiritually it must satisfy the soul. I know giving of myself always makes me feel right, feel more complete. Like I have a purpose. And then you see the child grow without unnecessary fears for the future.

Fostering is the same mothering. There is no difference. The child is yours . You might one day have to introduce the birth mother to the child but the child would have known that she existed long before.

Birdie McDonald has an MBE from the Queen. Born in the countryside in Jamaica, she grew up seeing her home become a safe place for so many children. There were always more than the immediate family sitting down to eat. Now she is 80 years old (and doesn’t even look it), lives in London UK and has fostered over 100 children since 1975.  Startling isn’t it. That so many children need to be fostered is one thing. But to have the will to do this means this formidable woman held firm to her determination to mother those who needed a mother.

On fostering, Miss Birdie comments “I think I’ve always been a bit of a mother figure, even from very young when I looked after my small siblings. As an adult, being able to foster has been more rewarding than I could have imagined. Yes, it’s demanding but bringing young people into your home, giving them love and watching them blossom is the best thing I could imagine doing with my life. My motto was always keep listening and learning.”

Prepare Yourself

I know Sharika House, another foster Mom would agree with her. I think if one is going to be a foster Mom then prepare yourself seriously. Like I say in my latest book Rockstar Mom, motherhood is a special responsibility that takes away a lot of you at the start. As you get the hang of it you get better at spending time with others, yourself and your significant others. I also point out that there are 7 key areas that have to be addressed in the family if parenting is to be successful.

If you have a flexible family that the child or children will become a part of, then fostering is not such a challenge. If you are alone then take some time and really prepare.

Sharika House  reminds mothers that, “Motherhood is a beautiful journey, but it can be overwhelming. We sacrifice a lot to ensure that our babies are always cared for and loved. But somehow we forget about ourselves in the midst of being amazing moms. The three life lessons I learned as an instant mom: mobilizing a support system, blocking time for myself at least once per month, and following my dreams made me feel alive again. Today, I dare you to find out what can make you feel alive again!

caption of picture:  from http://www.parentsofblackukpupils.co.uk/

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Author, retired professor, researcher, loving children, loving life.

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