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Back to school 2016 – listening to your kids

Back to school advice is easy to give but not so easy to follow

This advice is about listening to your kids. Are you a single Mom or Dad getting everything in order. One step at a time. Make sure all the books and backpacks are bought.

All the regulations and forms are filled in. .Then think about what arrangements are in place for meals at school and home. Breakfast included.

Now you are ready to think about really listening to your kids because you are the person that has to do the listening now. When you have a wider parenting base to help you prepare for school then it might not be as stressful.

Single parents and those with a wider parenting base need to find out when is the PTA and how to get involved. There is no other way to find out what is happening at school. Hearing one side of the story never works.

When to listen

Each day after school is quiet time. It is that time when the child calms down and settles into that familiar environment called home. The place where they feel comfortable and wanted. When they get home they usually want something to eat. When you are there, wait a bit and then ask how as your day. Especially for preschoolers, this is so key. They take a little time to start talking. And they have to be sure you are there and listening. Even if you are doing something let them know you are listening.

Is it advice they need? Or do they simply need a little sympathy and support?

I talk about this in my book. An important question when listening to your kids. The questions and the comments are never straight forward.. I don’t know why but we humans just go round in circles. Try not to blame the other person if there is conflict. But give your child support before you start blaming them or someone. We have to listen so carefully to hear what they are saying as it is always surprising what they are actually saying. 6 year old kids think they know everything and have every solution. That’s okay.It’s part of their self confidence. When listening to your kids, just balance it with a little experience from you. Don’t stifle that self confidence.

I guess that is why having both a male and female parent to give them the balance in advice is really great.

 

 

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